Sowwy I have been Weawwy Busy

Hi all, sorry for not posting in a while I have weawwy I mean really busy lately. I have been trying to count the corners in my living woom I mean room I get up to 3 then I can't wecaww I mean recall which ones I have counted so far and have to start over. My brother/husband got a new tattoo, its an arrow on his back pointing down with the words "insert penis" . It looks pretty cool hes weawwy I mean really proud of it. Well I gotta go the stupid kids are wowwing I mean rolling cars upside down across the floor they are so ugly when they do stupid stuff.

NO MORE ANIMALS!!!

All wight I mean all right. My brother/husband's friend ask if we could look after his sheep for a while. I said no at first but the sparkle in my husbands eyes made me change my mind. I weally I mean really don't like having animals around because my husband stops paying attention to me. Well the sheep has been here for a week and of course I am being ignored. So last night I get up and I find him making sweet love to the sheep. I was so mad, why can't he find time for me, the sheep, the goat, and the dog? So we awgued I mean argued this morning then we made up and had some sweet love until he started to say stuff like whimper like a dog and baa like a sheep. Which I did and I must say we had a gweat I mean great make up session.

How To Be Lazy(Part 2)

This is a picture of my bosses. As I said before I don't do cwap I mean CRAP at work, besides walk around looking busy and of course telling on everyone else. But they give me interns that do my job and this lets me walk around and talk a lot more. I mean cmon I am wtawded I mean retarded but my bosses do have their heads stuck too far in their asses to see me doing nothin all day then to give me people to do my job for me. So there you go just act retarded at work, do nothing, and the bosses will give you people to do your job for you, why? because they are afraid of being sued. So I get to walk around and talk about being a she-male or he-she or he-fe-trimale, and my stupid/ugly kids, and my goat loving husband, knowing they won't do anything to me but give me people to do my job. It's a weawwy I mean Really beautiful world.

New Development in DNA

Well I think the patewnity I mean paternity test wasn't right, as you can see by the photo of my son. The tree out in the front yard wetook I mean retook the test for me and it looks like the goat and the crabs are the fathers of my stupid kids. Well that takes a load out off my husband's mouth. He's so gay, with excitement about being able to show our kids at the Seneca County Fair next year. He's thinking they might even win. Now I just have to worry about keeping him away from the other farm animals.

My Husband's New Rock Band

Here's a picture of my brother/husband's new band. He's the one in the leather get up. That's one sweet moustache. I haven't been able to see them perform yet, they usually perform at some kind of gentlemen's club, and at the YMCA men's locker room. Yet they seem to really love each other's company when their at the house practicing, they are always running around naked and slapping each other's asses like they are some weird football team. I even walked in and saw one of them had pinned my brother/husband to the couch, well my brother/husband says thats what all wock I mean rock bands do to one another, they even include our goat in some of their get togethers. They all take turns wrestling the goat. Well I don't mind neither does the goat.

Thinking about Prom

I was looking through pictures of high school and was sad to think about my date's t-shirt(see Picture) said as he picked me up.

Beached Day Again

Well here is a picture of my mom in her bikini, waiting for some food.

Beach Day Revisited

This was the last picture taken as Aunt Fatty swam away. So anyone who has seen her please get a hold of me and my family as we are really wowwied I mean worried about Aunt Fatty.

Freak Show

I weally I mean really love my kids they can do no wrong in my eyes. Of course they are so stupid that they can do no right either. The local authorities have fenced in my house with the shown sign, I don't know why most of the town knows how wetawded I mean retarded our family is. I guess its in case someone from out of town is driving through our neighborhood. Which kinda happens alot just to see the fweak I mean freak show that is my family.

A Crab the Father of my Dumb Kids

Well I just got back the patewnuty I mean paternity test back from the bush outside of our house. It said it wasn't me who was the father, neither was my brother/husband ,and its 99.9% sure the dog is not the father. The bush said that the infestation of crabs (that I've had since I was 12) are the father(s) of my stupid kids. Which makes sense since my kids obviously didn't get their smarts from me or my brother/husband as we are not as smart as a pubic hair let alone a pubic louse.

Grumpy Goat Syndrome

Hi all I'm sorry I haven't updated in a while, but I've been ill. Funny story actually my brother/husband got a new goat recently. Well we haven't been getting along to well so he was sleeping with the goat. Then the fiwst I mean first night he came back I woke up with my male part in him. Later that day I started to feel ill. I went to the Veterinarian he told me I had Grumpy Goat Syndrome. Its weally howwible I mean really horrible you get these strange urges to tell on people for made up stuff and goat milk shoots out your ass. Well since this wasn't the first time I have caught some disease from my brother/husband that had an animals name in the middle of it I just forgave him. He's my brother/cousin/husband after all.

How to Be LAZY

I love work all I do is walk around with the expression that I don't understand anything, which weally I mean really I don't anyway. So you too could be like me, just look like a wetawd I mean retard and do nothing it's great. I spend my time talking to people about my ugly stupid kids, my hermaphorditism, and my semi-gay brother/husband. And I don't have to do a lick of work because people think I'm slow which I am. Just every once in a while I look like I'm doing something and people think I'm doing a good job, just because I'm retarded.

Using Gerbils to Scare the Mice

The Tale of Lemmiwinks

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Hi all I was talking to someone a while back about how to get rid of mice, well my grandmother used to tell me to stick 2 gerbils in my ass and that the mice would go away. I have used this old trick many times, now me and my brother/husband always stick 2 gerbils in our asses. And know what this act has scared the shit out of the mice so bad that we haven't had any mice in probably 5 years, although our gerbil bill is freaking outrageous.

Long Weekend

Hi it was a long weekend for me and my family, we awe I mean are traveling missionaries on the weekend we reenact stories from the bible dressed up in Star Wars costumes. Thats me on the toilet. We are usually so busy on the weekends that I can't wait till Monday to go back to work so I can do nothing. Like this morning all I've done is just walk around and tell people how stupid and ugly my kids are. I get away with it because I am wetawded I mean retarded, I don't have to do anything and I still get paid. You could too if your IQ was 3 and you got out smarted by inanimate objects.

Beach Day

Well I just got my pictures developed from our day at the beach , here is a picture of my mom,uncle/dad,and 2 aunts. I wore a bikini but I'm not going to post a pic of me because like I said I have both the male and female parts, but it turns my husband on so I just wear it to keep him happy. We had a vewy I mean very good time until some neo hippies thought some of our group were beached whales and kept pushing them back into the water, sadly Aunt Fatty didn't make it.

I stand up when I Pee There's nothing that weird about me

Yes I can stand up to pee, well what do you expect my mom married her brother so I am a hermaphrodite I got both the male and female parts. My cousin/brother/husband really likes it that way mostly because mine is bigger than his. I even have woken up a few times to find my male part inside of my female part or inside of my husband. My brother/husband think thats how I got pregnant with my stupid kids. He says we need to get a paternity test to find out if he or I or the family dog is the father. But then again he is way smarter than me we had IQ tests taken by the tree in the front yard(who always beats us in trivial pursuit) and he scored a whopping 4 while I only got a 3. He's a genius, thats why he has a job milking bulls with his mouth.

Seneca County Fair

I know its been over a month since the fair, but I just feel all giddy for a while cause it was after the fair years ago that my brother I mean husband and I started dating. Well heres the story my brother/husband used to be a popular guy, with the ladies, and some men, and a few farm animals. But years ago at the fair, on rodeo night in front of all of Seneca County. He was caught in a compromising position with a bull. Well needless to say he was never the same. Neither was the bull. The bull now will only ride the cowboy, to techno music and has to have a pink cowboy hat on before he does the show. As for my brother/husband well he had no other choice but to start dating me, but the funny thing is that everytime we drive by a herd of cattle I can here MOORE MOORE MOORE.

The Family Get Together

Yep thats my husband and dad playing around, wight I mean right before they started the naked wrestling match that usually means the end of summer for my family. A little about my family my mom married her brother, my uncle I mean my dad and my brother I mean cousin I mean husband and I have have 2 god awfully stupid kids, somebody should have stopped us from breeding ,well theres a little information until next time.